How far would you go??
I just came across this article on MSN.com, and found it kind of intriguing in a few ways.
http://worldblog.msnbc.msn.com/archive/2007/01/18/33735.aspx
Firstly, it reminded me how amazing medical science is these days, and what extraordinary lengths people are willing to take to have children.
Then I thought (and subsequently found many comments agreeing with me) what person in their right mind would want to explain the circumstances of their conception & birth to that child in 10 years? Can you imagine it? "Yes, little Jimmy, your daddy did die 5 years before you were born...and your mommy is someone I found through the newspaper who lives halfway across the world (or even, your grandma advertised for someone to be your mommy through the newspaper)." What kind of issues do you think this kid would grow up with?
Then I started to think again...there are lots of imperfect families out there, and simply stating that since this kid might not have a biological father in the picture, and therefore will have issues is just not right. There are many loving families out there that aren't exactly traditional, and it seems like this woman has put a lot of time into choosing someone to carry this child. It's not really clear who would be raising it in the long term, but I think I'd give the benefit of the doubt here and believe that no matter who it is would be a loving caregiver.
And who knows? Maybe this child would someday embrace this story as proof of how much his (or her) biological father wanted them and the extraordinary lengths their grandmother went to to acheive it. That they get to carry on his legacy, whatever that may be....
But then again, what if everything doesn't play out like the picture perfect fairytale? And is this really, truly something that 19 year old soldier would've chosen? Does it make sense that his mother can make that decision for him after his death?
Such a touchy subject, so many questions, but really who does have the answers? I guess only time will tell.
In the meantime, it's one hell of a story.....your thoughts?
posted by skeeter @ 1:08 p.m.
3 comments
3 Comments:
Wow. That's f*%cked up. Unbelievable.
That woman, the dead soldier's mother, who has arranged all of this, needs to let go. Who will raise this child?
And as you said, how will they explain this to the child?
I was asking the same thing...you raises the child? Will it be the biological mother? It wasn't clear in the article whether or not the grandmother would take care of the kid.
Hey, my view is, as long as the kid has a good life, that's what counts. This world has changed so much to the point where there are a kajillion possibilities in the future of where families are concerned.
I think...that I would find myself out of place but that's because of what I grew up in. But our own children...maybe they won't think it's a big deal.
Wow! Where do I start? There are so many issues with this process. I guess I'll just focus on one area.
This sort of thing opens the door to genetic engineering. What I mean by this is that the future grandmother conducted medical tests and interviews for potential candidates. Although this is a far cry from genetic engineering, it's still on the path leading up to the door of gene selection.
In a way, I'm making assumptions. For all I know, the medical tests could have been to determine whether or not the potential mother could physically have a baby but I'm sure the tests went deeper than that... for example, searching for genetic diseases, disorders, and the sorts.
Additionally, the grandmother got to choose the potential mother based not only on the medical evaluation but also on the looks/personality of the potential mother during an interview. (Darwin's theory of natural selection comes to mind.)
I guess it can be argued that when a man looks for a woman, he bases it on looks and personality. It's not unrealistic that medical tests may be run to determine the potential for birth defects. Furthermore, there are lot of people who use sperm banks and chose the donor based upon medical history and appearances.
However, the difference is that the man is dead... and that's where the ethical issues have effect – especially when a third party chooses a womb based upon medical evaluations and appearances. It's one thing for a spouse of a deceased husband to take his sperm... it's a whole other issue when another family member or other third party takes that sperm and chooses a candidate.
Furthermore, this soldier’s dream was to have a child but he probably also implied that he wanted to raise that child... not just have it. This woman saying her son came to her in a dream is absurd!
Nevertheless, I agree with Palmer that all that really matters is that the child is brought up in a loving environment and taken care of ensuring all needs are met. I also agree with James, this woman needs to let go.
Sorry for the long post.
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